A Lesson in the Grocery Store

It seems like a simple enough task to run to Wal-Mart the day before the Super Bowl, right? Right! We only needed a few things: milk, sugar, eggs, etc. So my husband and I pack Zachary into the car and head off. The walk through the store is remarkably easy. And we manage to avoid the chip, soda, and beer aisles altogether... a feat in itself! Remember, the Big Game is tomorrow! Anyway, as we are waiting in line to check out, a mother, grandmother, and 2 young children pull up behind us. The little boy was maybe 2 years old and he was a hysterical mess. I just smiled knowing what it is like to have a loud, crying child in the store. I always sympathize with the parent. That's embarrassing! The other child, a baby, was snug in her car seat in the cart not making a peep. Grandma was unloading the cart and yelling at little Justin (I learned his name quickly due to all the yelling). And Mom was on her cell phone, yelling at Justin, swearing about the message she had just received: using words I'd never use... let alone in public or to my child! My heart began to break for Justin. Here he was crying (I'm sure because he wanted something he couldn't have), Grandma was yelling at him; so was Mommy. But no one was really paying attention to him. My sweet little boy, Zachary, is such a tender-hearted child. He was obviously concerned for his "friend." Zachary couldn't look away... but kept his ears covered. I hope some of the expletives were muted! And all he could say was, "Oh no, Momma! Crying! So loud!" Ben and I asked him to stop pointing because it's not nice. And that Justin was going to be OK: He was just sad. What a chaotic checkout we had!

As we were walking out to the car, I held Zachary's hand. He skipped happily as I told him I was proud of him for being a good boy in the store. I also held my sweet husband's hand and told him I felt terrible for that little boy. To me, it was no wonder he was acting the way he was. I'd cry too if my guardians swore at me, yelled at me, and pushed me around in front of complete strangers. And all the while, no one made eye contact with Justin. It may be a bit of a snap judgment, but I figured his home life wasn't much different. I just wanted to scoop him up and take him home with us for a few hours.

I do not tell you this story because Justin was being so naughty that I couldn't help but write about it. I also do not tell you this story because I think my son was a perfect angel compared to Justin. Believe me, we've had our share of horrible trips to the store. Though, I'll admit, I was just a little proud of myself. I have never embarrassed my son like that. If we ever have a public problem, I scoop him up in my arms, hold him tightly, look him directly in the eyes, and speak only to him. I tell him that I need him to behave. That his behavior is completely unacceptable and rude, and that if he will not stop, he will be punished as soon as we get home.

Mommies, our children are gifts. Yes, these gifts make us crazy sometimes. Yes, they can drive us up a wall in a matter of seconds. But they are precious...nothing short of a miracle. It is our God-given responsibility to love and nurture them. Part of that nurturing includes punishment, yes, but never demeaning them. My heart is broken for Justin today. My prayer for you is that you are teaching people lessons when you take your children to the grocery store, to the bank, or to school. Everyone is watching. So is your screaming child. Teach them how to react in stressful situations. Teach them how to love the children they may have one day. Teach them self control. One day, these people who once saw you in the store with your hysterical child may remember you. They may not know your name, but they will know your heart. And now you know mine.